Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Finding Meaning in Tragedy

UPDATE: After posting this, we received feedback from one of Janice's clients, Jeff W., who lives in Charleston. He wanted to let us know how the community has been responding:

"I was reading your post about the tragedy here and wanted to tell you what our experience has been. Sandy, Sophie and I have been attending many of the vigil's since it happened. To say the least, it has been an amazing, uplifting, inspiring experience for all of us. The family, friends and associates of the deceased have responded with Love and Forgiveness since day 1! Unbelievable, to say the least. We have not seen a moment of hatred, bigotry, or violence.. Sunday night, for example, we all went to the Ravenel bridge vigil where upwards of 20,000 people from all faith's and denominations showed up to join hands in unity to pray for love, forgiveness, peace and acceptance. We renamed the Ravenel to the "Bridge for Peace" for the night. The people, police, firefighters, politicians, relatives of the deceased, joined hands on the bridge to shout this message. People were high fiving, raising their hands in the peace sign. Cars traveling on the bridge were blowing their horns. Everyone had a huge smile on their faces. I was so grateful to be there. For this moment in time, from this community, a message to the world and beyond has been sent out! I am so proud to live here in Charleston County right now. I think it all started at the bond hearing for the young man who committed the crime. Relatives of the deceased attended and instead of screaming out their grief, turned to him and said, "I forgive you"! Not a new message for sure, but, in this case, a new astounding reaction to a violent act. Well, we all heard their voice. For this moment we have woken up and joined them in celebrating peace, love and forgiveness instead of hatred and violent reactions. I think God is smiling right now. I only hope this message travels far and wide and doesn't fade away too soon. It has changed many of us here in Charleston. Three cheers for this community and the people who started it!"


ORIGINAL POST: The Charleston shooting has been on the periphery of my vision. It was only today that I could really think about what it means and why it happened. To think about the horror of such an act, and how many we've had to process recently, it really is hard to come up with ways to explain it or find purpose in it.

As most of you know from working with me, the guides teach that we create the circumstances of our lives for a reason and to learn. The people who lost their lives the night of the shooting were prayerful, loving, beautiful people. Many close to them attest to their goodness and their kindness. The idea that something like this befell them, these good people, is tragic. Still, I can't help but find meaning in the fact that these people, these good people, would not have wanted their deaths to be used as fodder for hate or for fear. These good people would have wanted the tragedy of their deaths to somehow inspire connection, love, and understanding. It is with that in mind that I think we may find a way forward. It would be so understandable if people retracted, hid themselves, and stopped taking risks. Of course, a part of us wants to not face the problems in our society that need fixing at all; addressing mental health, race inequality, and weapon control not the least of these. How do we come to an agreement with so many dissenting voices?

Far from hiding, and playing into the illusion of our separateness; we must take this moment to connect even more to those in our community, to cross boundaries, and to stop being afraid of that which we don't have much experience with. Often, when we approach the thing we have anxiety about; all fear drops away and we are left wondering why we were afraid in the first place! We are so afraid of being judged, of not being accepted; sometimes we stop trying. Fostering our own worth of self and continuing to be an emissary for light in this world, despite the obstacles entailed, will remove these fears. Perceived judgement cannot touch you when you know and love yourself as much as you deserve.

Help support those who who need it in finding assistance, be aware of those in our lives that are not receiving what they require and take action, support equality, bridge understanding and differences, and alter your way of life to make more time for connection: these are the things that will help us to move into a more peaceful and happier world. I believe that this is what the shooting in Charleston can teach us. Let us honor these amazing souls by endeavoring to create a better, kinder world. Maybe, if we can start to create that world, these atrocities will end.

Remember, we are all connected. If you are feeling sad or overwhelmed by emotions circulating right now, remember to bless the feeling and then shake it off and let it go. You will be better able to handle everything from a place of quiet.

Thank you so much Jeff for sharing this with us and for sharing your love with the community of Charleston. It's people like you and your family that are really doing the work of bringing everyone to the next level!

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