Tuesday, January 12, 2016

WHERE DID ALL THE JOY GO? I THINK IT LEFT WITH ALL THE TIME!

I'M NOT FEELING THE JOY - BUT I'M FEELING EVERYTHING ELSE!

Here's a few of the messages I've received from you all these past couple of days:

"I don't even care it's the holidays... When it rains, it pours, if it can go wrong it will go wrong. It's just all at once that I have to deal with finals and work out of the blue and shipping boxes and errands and people visiting for only a short time frame that can't be put it off until later... and then while at it, everything breaks..."
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"The anxiety this morning is way overwhelming and not even quite clear as to where it is coming from... It feels unmanageable and is making me feel like I want to run and hide. The minute I got out the door it hit me like a ton of bricks."
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"December is my hardest month to get through.... I always get sick this time of year. I get the most abuse when I need support. When I feel bad about myself I get the extreme abuse. What the f###? I know I am creating this. This sucks!!"
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"I feel really f*cked up, lots of anxiety, and I really don't know what else I can do. We just have a complete miscommunication over really basic stuff that should be talked out. I don't know I just wanted to tell you.."
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Wow, folks! I wish I could wave my magic wand and help you all get rid of these overwhelming feelings, but unfortunately that's not the way this works! As my angels and guides tell me it would be like being given the answers to the test and you wouldn't learn anything. So, this challenging, overwhelmed, no time, no support thing seems to be something we all just need to go through right now, including me. I am so exhausted, overwhelmed, feeling mentally, emotionally and physically drained. I used to enjoy the holidays - decorating, cooking, baking and looking for special gifts, getting to spend more time with the ones I love...

Well, I wish I could tell you that it has been fun like that these last few years, but it has become more of "I don't want to do this" than a joyous celebration. I hear this so often these days. I can tell you as an empath and a human being, I feel it all and have gone through most of it and am continuing to work on my journey to be an unconditional loving being, but it's not easy!

It does not matter what level you are at, there is always more to learn and the lessons are pushing us all. There is so much to understand about what is taking place as we traverse this journey that is unlike any other. But one thing is for sure, we are on a journey that makes us feel, feel and feel some more.

Over the past few years, as the evolution of our planet has gone into overdrive, we are getting hit left and right with so much so often that most people can't take anymore. We are in a time where as I say often, no matter how much you run, hide, ignore, and/or try and numb it away, all of your fears will be in your face, growing bigger and bigger until we finally stop. Stop being afraid of ourselves, each other, our future, our past and take a good long look at what we are doing and why.

We are all over the place, out of control, feeling unsafe and afraid. The changes are happening, faster and faster these days. "Our stuff" what ever it is for each of us, is making us sick and tired of being sick and tired, yet we still continue doing the "supposed to." We've got to let go of that.

When others step in and help us prove our stuff, it doesn't help either. We're all in this together, though, and everyone is growing and learning. That's why we're all here.

I wish I could tell you an easy way to make it all better, all go away. That is what the work is for! At this time, though, we really have to do the work, so it can be easier, when we have those buttons pushed, and it's in our face. We will know what it is trying to show us and help us with, instead of just repeating the same old programs to prove our beliefs about ourselves, other people and the world. It is also going to feel like we don't have time to do anything because we really don't have time to do anything! Time is sped up. Things are moving fast. So understanding what is going on is going to be imperative to your evolution.

Take solace knowing that many many people out there are having the same issues and frustrations pop up. You are not alone. The energy is crazy right now. It's there to push us towards doing this a better way, but we're still in progress, sort of in the middle of the hourglass, trying to make our way through to the better, lighter, happier other side.

Do the work, because it will help. There is no way out only through, so it's up to you, your life, your spirit, your choice. What do I mean by the work? I mean learning to understand how we work, what it's really trying to help you with and the exercises, tools and tips I give you all to help you to feel better. Sit down, breathe, meditate, shake off, look at why something makes you feel a certain way, where it's coming from and what it makes you feel about yourself ultimately. Write it down, keep emailing your frustrations, get it all out. Make a daily practice for yourself. You have to do the work to have it have an affect on you.

If you're not sure what I'm talking about, then go watch our Energy Basics and Energy Affects classes. The first is 30 minutes and the second is an hour. Find the time to learn what and how you can do to better protect yourself from all of this energy.

If you have a commute, take a listen to How to Survive Earth School. It's a great way to remind yourself of the tools we use to process experiences.

Do your best, don't stress too much. This is something we're all just going to have to go through right now, but remember we are all in this together and together we can learn to not only survive but to thrive!

With Love

Friday, January 8, 2016

Coping with Depression at the Holidays

What About When the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.... Isn't....


​​The bright lights and cheerful music can create an ironic backdrop when you're not feeling your best, or when the time of year coincides with sad anniversaries.

Yesterday was the anniversary of the Sandy Hook shooting, which happened not too far away in Newtown, CT.  What a tragic event that was, and how awful for the families who must go into the Holiday season with the recollection of that day and the losses suffered.

In some ways, the Holidays operate as a large collaborative accounting of people's year.  I don't think we intend to, but we put an awful lot of pressure on each other at this time of year to "show up."  Personally, putting up lights, getting a tree, decorating it, and grabbing small gifts and making sure I don't forget anyone or anything starts to feel a bit forced when I'm trying to squeeze it into an already overwhelmed schedule.  

It's easy to feel like you just can't stack up at this time of year.  Even people who generally "have it all together" will fall to pieces at the Holidays if things aren't just so.  

Janice has said that the illusions and fears we hold about life will get bigger and bigger until we do something to address it.  I feel that the Holiday charade has gotten so large, with people literally running each other over to be the first in line, that it seems that the time has come to change how we do this a little bit.

If you're feeling down at the Holidays, try to hang on to the meaning in the season; not the fabricated version, but the intended meaning: gratitude, caring for each other and inner awareness.

Common Holiday Emotions and Tips to Manage Them:

Feelings Resulting from Perceived Lack Lack is meaning anything that you don't have that you wish you did or think that you should.  Things that might fall into this category include money, time, success, having a family, or partner.  This may cause people to feel sad, frustrated, or even angry that things aren't different.

Tips to Manage: Instead of focusing on what you don't have or what you wish was different, make a list of things that you do have that you can be grateful for.  
  • Money lack: If you don't have alot of money to buy people gifts, see what you do have and try to do something thoughtful that won't break the bank.  It doesn't help anyone for all of us to be spending ourselves into the poorhouse.  Making something is a wonderful way to show someone that you care, even if it's cardboard ornaments, or a reusable rice heating pad.  

  • Time lack: If you feel like you don't have enough time to do what you want then take a look at where your time is going.  Keep track of your movements for three days.  Where does your time mostly go?  Sometimes awareness shows us that we aren't using time to it's greatest advantage.  If you want to go Holiday shopping, perhaps you can schedule that in over a few days, rather than trying to do a marathon store run.  Online shopping also makes it easier to manage time and shopping.  If you just wish you had more time to spend with loved ones, communicate that to them, and perhaps create space away from tech and tv to have some quality time.  No plan gets created if people don't express their interest or need for one!

  • Lack in Success:  Like money lack, success lack often results from looking at what we don't have rather than what we do.  What have you accomplished this year?  If you take a look at everything that happened this year, you may be surprised to see that you did way more than you thought.  Don't compare yourself to someone else.  Everyone is fighting their own battle, and you don't know what someone else's life is like, no matter what pretense they may put up.  If you've taken steps to pursue your own happiness in any capacity this year, and I bet you have, then you have been, and continue to be, successful.

  • Lack in Family or Partner Relationships: If you struggle with feeling that your personal relationships should be further along than they are or if you are coping with loneliness at the Holidays then consider why you feel this way.  Everything has two sides.   Relationships and families have their own stresses and pressures.  While it may seem attractive from the outside, getting involved and creating a family in the wrong circumstances will not solve your problem of loneliness.  Waiting for the "right" one may feel like an endless wait, but feeling like your life should be further along is pointless if the person you're meant to be with just hasn't arrived into your life yet.  Find a way to take the focus off of you, maybe by volunteering or giving back in some way.  Many, many elders spend the Holidays alone.  Again, be grateful for the ones in your life, spend time with them, and see what you can learn from the friendships and other connections you do have rather than pining for something you don't.


Feelings Resulting from Not Being Able to Do It All -  Juggling alot at the Holidays has become a skill that even a circus clown would find challenging.  I personally know many people who begin their Christmas shopping in September just to get ahead of the curve.  Between getting something special for the ones you love, trying to spend quality time, baking and cooking, preparing for Holiday dinners, and getting all the decorations up, you're somehow supposed to have time to relax and reflect on the season.  Many of us never get to that last part.

Tips to Manage:  What can you cut out without too much of a backlash, while still enjoying the season.  What, really, are your priorities, and what do you only think you should do?  Focus on your priorities, and let the other stuff go.  If you don't actually enjoy decorating the house, foundation to roof, in Christmas lights, then don't do it!  Invest your time in the things that will bring you joy, and you'll be more joyful - imagine that!

Feelings of Not Feeling Cared About - It's easy to feel slighted at the Holidays.  Everyone is running around crazy.  Especially if we have a belief of not being cared about, it's easy to find that proof in Holiday gifts or lack thereof, people not pitching in, or feeling that your good intentions are going unnoticed.  If you want to find out more about how to manage this particular belief, I suggest tuning into our podcast: How to Survive Earth School, available on Itunes and Soundcloud, for a special episode on How to Survive the Holidays!  


In Conclusion:
Be well, everyone.  Remember to shake it off, and I highly suggest taking one of Janice's classes on learnitlive.com to learn more about how energy and other people's emotions can easily be transferred to us.  It's really important, especially since most people are much more sensitive than they believe, that we all start understanding how we affect each other!

​- Christine

Monday, January 4, 2016

Gratitude Exercises For Happiness

When Thanksgiving comes around, we may often find ourselves running back to the grocery store at 10am for that last minute purchase, pulling our hair out, or engaged in a seething inner argument about whether to let that last comment from Aunt Edna go, rather than practicing gratitude as the Holiday suggests.

It brings up an interesting aspect of the Holidays.  The meaning of the season often gets left behind as people scramble for Black Friday deals, and bend over backwards to give their families the best that they can with limited time and, often, limited budgets.

In a recent newsletter sent out to our mailing list, Janice implores us to remember that there are many people in the world who cannot celebrate or do not have anyone to celebrate the holidays with.  It's a good reminder, especially as we eye Aunt Edna gearing up for a tirade...

In years past, the holidays have felt forced to me.  Thanksgiving's original celebration seems overshadowed by the grim events that followed for the indigenous people who were helpful to the settlers that first Thanksgiving.  Christmas, too, has felt less and less about the original purpose i.e. celebrating the religious holiday and birth of Christ, and more like a consumption riddled frenzy.  I'm not religious, so attempts to make it feel more sacred aren't necessarily the answer.

Somewhere under all the glitter, and the signs, and the deals, and the gluttony; there is a real reason for celebrating the holidays.  I would like to tease this out of the rituals and habits visited each season without much thought.

It seems to make sense to go back to the root of the Holidays.  Despite what happened since; Thanksgiving is a day in which friends and family gather, after the Harvest, to express their thankfulness.  Gratitude itself is such a wonderful and important part of a healthy lifestyle.  Many studies have shown that those that practice gratitude everyday tend to be more optimistic and healthier.

This article from Harvard mentions several such studies where the outcome proved, once again, all the benefits of practicing gratitude.

If we are to take anything from the Holidays; perhaps it should be that this feeling is one that shouldn't occur only once or twice a year, but something that we practice all year long.

This isn't a new concept, by any means, but it's one that we see people struggling to put into action.

Exercises for gratitude can include:
  • Journaling each day and listing something you are grateful for, no matter how inane or seemingly unimportant.
  • Remembering to thank the people in your life for their assistance and for going out of their way for you.
  • Looking at the things we often feel plagued or upset by and trying to find something positive in it; perhaps a lesson learned, a connection, or recognition of having overcome it.  Be grateful for the silver lining.
  • At meal times remembering to be thankful for your food, and sharing that gratitude out loud with those you may eat with, or thanking those that prepared the meals not only verbally but in your actions (perhaps by helping to clean up).

Christmas, too, can have the the true meaning teased out.  If Thanksgiving is expressing thanks and practicing gratitude, that I see Christmas as a time of giving and showing people we care and appreciate them.  Here are some of the ways to do this other than opening you wallet too wide:
  • Have a story time, let everyone share something from their life that the others may not know and really listen to them.  Our culture typically has us glossing over the meaningful things in our lives and staying very surface with each other.  Practice deep listening.
  • Make something for someone, especially something that you know that they really need.  Again, this means having listened and paid attention to each other.
  • Do something nice for the other person, if that means helping them dig snow or clean up the house, bake something or invite them to dinner.  Actions can often speak louder than words.  What has someone in your life been putting off for a long time that you can help with?
  • Let people know you love and appreciate them.  Use the traditional 12 days of Christmas as a starting point, and maybe leave them a note for each day with something else you appreciate about them.  If we do not tell someone we care and appreciate them, they may not know!

In other suggestions, planning to do something together in the future, or to work on a project together, create something, or help another with something, go on a trip or otherwise spend time together is another wonderful way to surpass the over-materialism of the Holidays.  

Experiences and spending time together is what it's all about, learning and growing with each other!  

Let me be clear that I have nothing specifically against present giving - it's more the unconscious purchasing of things that people do not need or cannot use very much just as a sort of throw away giving that I dislike. The world needs us to be more thoughtful with our consumption, and in the end; I believe it detracts from the purpose of the season.  If getting the mashed potatoes just right is going to take you away from actually enjoying your Holiday, then screw the mashed potatoes and eat chips with your turkey.  

Let yourself have fun and play with the Holiday, trying your best but not beating yourself up if for some reason it doesn't go the way you expected.  

Focus on your intention of gratitude and giving and all will go right!


- Christine